If some of the comments below sound familiar then maybe you're heading down the slippery slope of mountain biking faster than you think...
You think £3K is a fair amount of money to spend on a bike.
All your T-shirts have some stupid Fox logo on them.
Your legs show various scars and wounds that you are proud of.
All your biking buddies are known by some daft nickname.
You make stupid ‘horned devil fingers’ sign with your hands.
There is a pile of mountain bike magazines next to the loo.
You drive hundreds of miles to get cold, wet, sweaty, covered in mud and suffer great pain.
If you don't ride for a few days you get techy and moody.
You use Presta inner tubes instead of Schraeder.
You have become an expert in gear ratios & chain ring compatibility.
You refer to all your non-biking friends as "Dude!"
You are no longer totally overawed by the products for sale in Stif.
The blokes at Stif know your name.
You are still treated with utter contempt and resentment by the blokes in Stif.
Polishing your helmet and checking your bladder no longer means what it used to.
Your wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/pet chipmunk/all of them have forgotten what you look like.
You no longer say "Hello", "Goodbye", "That's great", "I agree", "This weather's nice": one word now fulfills this function and more. The word: RISPEKT.
The only meal you ever eat in pubs is steak & chips.
Every Friday your next door neighbour says:
"So where you off biking this weekend?"
After a wet and muddy ride you must clean and oil your chain. If you clean no other part of your bike, you must clean your chain.